Your survival guide to dinner with the parents
By Rayan Abdulkadir
Q: My boyfriend asked me to come over and meet his parents. I'm so nervous. What should I do?
A: First and foremost, congratulations on taking this next step in your relationship! Next up is marriage, three kids, a mortgage, and a Great Dane named Woofer. You're getting closer and closer to the future each day. Meeting the parents can be incredibly nerve-wracking; it makes sense that you're feeling the way you do. I hope my advice can help you walk into your meeting with your boyfriend and his parents with confidence.
What often worries people about meeting important or new people is how they present themselves, and whether or not they're saying the right things. You might want to impress his parents by telling them about your achievements and accomplishments, but I doubt that's what they want to hear. Instead, stay mysterious. Tell them as little as possible about yourself; mystery is what keeps the excitement alive. If his mom asks what you're majoring in, you can say, “I'm taking courses on being cool and nonchalant, with a minor in mystery.” They are BOUND to be impressed by your secrecy.
Every time anyone asks you a question, be sure to be completely unclear and off-putting while looking over your shoulder every once in a while so it might look like you're being followed. It might help to respond with things like, “Wouldn't you like to know?” or “Who's asking?” I'd also suggest wearing all black and maybe even sunglasses inside. Additionally, I highly recommend talking to yourself every few minutes, dictating the situation to keep a record, of course. It might be helpful to conduct a search of the house as well... just in case things hit the fan.
If you're worried about keeping the conversation going, here are a few answers you can give them:
If they ask: “So, what do you enjoy doing?”
You say: “Oh, I dabble in a few things…”
If they ask: “Are you enjoying dinner?”
You say: (Push the food around your plate.) “I haven't tried it yet... Is it safe?”
If they ask: Would you like some tea or coffee?
You say: “If it's not poisoned then sure….”
If they ask: “Why are you wearing all black?”
You say: “Sun protection is important, don’t you think?”
Just make sure that whatever they ask, you respond with the most outlandish and odd response possible. It'll make you seem so interesting and cool! Who wouldn't want to impress their boyfriend's parents that way?
Mystery is the key to keeping things fresh and interesting. I wish you the best of luck in this milestone.
