My Summer of Brain Rot and Low Motivation

Surviving the season as a girl with no hobbies

By Leah Keith

Growing up, I always loved the idea of summer—no school, beautiful weather and all the time in the world to hang out with friends and enjoy the season. Summer gave everyone, except maybe my parents, a much-needed break. However, even as a child, I remember feeling this overwhelming sense of existential dread by the time July rolled around. The thrill of getting out of school had worn off, and I began thinking … summer is lowkey boring.

Now that I’m in college, with more freedom than ever before, I still find myself twiddling my thumbs by mid-July and wondering if summer will ever come to an end. This is all quite ironic because during the school year, I fill my Google Calendar to the brim and always imagine that summer would appease my busy and anxiety-inducing schedule. While yes, my schedule is far less busy in the summer, I’ve quickly realized that being less busy does not solve all of my issues. Instead, my quiet summer schedule allows me to over-analyze my entire existence while endlessly scrolling on TikTok. My brain begins rotting by the day.

While a majority of college students go home for the summer, I chose to stay on campus with a few of my friends. Although living at St. Kate’s made working a lot easier, as we all had on-campus jobs, it definitely came with its challenges. One of my summer roommates, Tessa Schoenecker, mentioned how empty the campus feels in the summer. “It feels like a ghost town, and the only things to do are really work or leave,” she said. One of my other roommates, Rachel Solberg, made a similar comment: “The whole summer was a blur. I worked 40 hours a week to pay for this college. We love corporate schemes. It was nice to be here with friends, but since I had to work so much I didn't really see them much.” Real. Although I appreciated how summer housing gave me the option to stay in the cities while working full-time, I didn’t love living on a deserted campus all summer.

So, I worked away my summer at my St. Kate’s job, getting a paycheck from the school every two weeks just for me to eventually pay the school back in tuition money. Yessssss. For most college students, summers are spent like this, working full-time just so they can afford to attend college for another year. As I go through the monotony of my summer work schedule, I begin to realize that this will eventually be what I do for the rest of my life. After college, I enter the workforce, and then I work full-time until I retire. I knew that would happen, but I’ve been a student for so long that it's difficult to imagine not being a student. And to be honest, I hate working. There will definitely be an adjustment period post-graduation.

Even though I hate summer, I will say that there are a few positive aspects of this season. First of all, summer has great weather for picnics and swimming! Love both of those activities and love a good long skirt moment for summer picnics. However, my overall summer wardrobe majorly flops. I dictate my outfit choices based solely on how much I’ll sweat that day—hate that. Anyway, summer also gives people more time to pursue hobbies! Side note: This is not a pro for people with no hobbies, like myself.

Nevertheless, my lack of hobbies does not deter me from trying. Every summer, I start an activity like crocheting or practicing my guitar, but I always give up by the time school starts in the fall. Instead of pursuing hobbies, my free time is spent anxiously contemplating how I’m wasting my life away. As I ponder the meaning of life, I start spiraling into a season of existential dread, and although I love thinking about these philosophical questions, too much philosophical questioning deteriorates my mental health. I quickly begin scratching at the walls, wondering if this is how that woman from The Yellow Wallpaper felt. She was honestly so real for that.

As I thought more and more about my hatred of summer, I quickly realized that although I hate summer, after graduation, summer becomes just another season—no more three-month break. Work doesn’t really have a summer vacation. Maybe I’ll get three weeks of paid time-off, but even that’s pushing it …

As this article comes to an end, I’ll leave you with these final thoughts that really resonate with me.

“I got that summertime, summertime sadness

Su-su-summertime, summertime sadness

Got that summertime, summertime sadness

Oh, oh-oh, oh-oh”

- Lana Del Rey

Hope you all survived the summer

xoxo Leah