Bachelor's Day is here — let's...celebrate?

Bachelor’s Day is held every four years on leap day, February 29.

Leap day is just around the corner, and you know what that means! Time to celebrate the Irish tradition of Bachelor’s day! After four long years of waiting tirelessly, I can finally propose to the love of my life and break down the rules of society!

Hello, February 29th, when I have the power to turn gender roles on their heads and do something I can’t do any other day of the year!

Hello, gender binary that only includes a woman and a man!

Hello, assumption that a romantic relationship can only exist between a man and a woman who accept the roles and rules that society places on them-- can I call you heteronormativity for short? 

Oh how exciting! Bachelor’s Day is the one 24-hour time span when I can take charge in my relationship. On this special day that only comes every four years, I can make sure my man is forever my man. Here is the one lone day when I can woman up and ask my own questions instead of waiting and waiting and waiting for him to pop the question.

When I say Bachelor’s Day, I’m not talking about ABC's The Bachelor. (I know, I know. I’m disappointed, too.) Forget about group dates and rose ceremonies. Bachelor’s day is an Irish leap year tradition that takes place on February 29th. It supposedly originated from a deal struck between St. Patrick and St. Bridget that allowed women to propose to men once every four years. 

Leap day was an opportunity for women in hetero relationships to “leap” away from the traditional gender norms of their culture and propose to a man instead of waiting for him to get down on one knee. If a man refused a Bachelor’s day proposal, he was obligated to buy the woman an expensive item, such as a new coat or a gown. 

A Bachelor’s Day postcard from 1908. Source: Wikipedia

Although progressive for its time, this tradition in the context of today’s society has quite a few problems, some of the more obvious being the idea that women can’t propose to men on any day they want and the assumption that all couples are heterosexual. 

Traditions can be fun, but by definition, a tradition is a repetition of a custom or belief from generation to generation, so they often begin to feel outdated eventually. It’s ok for traditions to persist even as times change, but I think we need to at least have a conversation about and acknowledge the fact that this particular tradition (like many others) reinforces the gender binary and assumes heteronormativity.

Here’s my proposal for Bachelor's Day: I propose that we normalize the idea that anyone can ask anyone else to marry them on any day they choose. Why must this moment be structured by rules of gender, time, and tradition? Why stop there? I propose that anyone who doesn’t want to get married should not be pressured into it. Alternatively, if you find this tradition endearing or cute, I propose that you act on it. I propose that you propose to your significant other on Bachelor’s Day. 

Take what you will from Bachelor’s Day, or don’t. My point is, every day is significant if you make it significant. Don’t let time, gender roles, or tradition dictate your choices. Be your own person. Happy leap year, Wheel readers!